WORKSHEET

Rewriting My Story - Healing of Memories

A "WORKSHEET" is simply a way for you to look squarely at yourself and see where you are.  Like a GPS system in your car or in your phone, you have to know where you're at, honestly, clearly and completely. 

At the beginning of these worksheets, take time to pause and quiet yourself, breathing and relaxing as mentioned in the "HOW TO USE" tab.  This is a great time for reflection as to how to care for yourself.  Ask the Holy Spirit for inspiration and insight as you work through this worksheet.

Receiving Healing.....

This is an exciting and important worksheet.  You are invited to allow the LIVING Jesus to be with you, to comfort you to and bring truth to you in all the wounding experiences of your life, experiences that, in fact, are still LIVING within your mind, emotions and body.

In addition, as the Holy Spirit comes and lives within us at our deepest core, we have the incredible gift of being transformed in our thoughts and emotions by receiving the thoughts and heart-perspective of Jesus Himself.  
Healing occurs from the INSIDE-OUT!  This type of on-going healing flows as a cleansing and life-giving river to our OUTSIDE, where our thoughts, images and reactive emotions exist.
 
It is important to understand that rather than having harmful memories and emotions at our core, and God trying to dig into them, the opposite is now true.  God is at our core and flows outward to our memories and the deep beliefs and emotions associated with them.  This is the deepest healing imaginable! 
 
As we invite Jesus to meet us in our memories, we experience the gradual change from general distress to experiencing His calming presence with us.  He is not bound by “time” as we know it, and therefore is not only with us NOW, but also can be present in any and all our memories!  He tells us TODAY about the impact of that memory on you, both then and now, and He tells us WHY it happened as well!  Many people “see” a memory, but in their mind’s eye now with Jesus Himself with them, explaining, comforting, reassuring, encouraging, and now re-writing!

Remember that the work of healing through this workbook is not a substitute for professional counseling.  As you seek healing for loss and healing of memories, the flight/fight/shut down neurological response may be activated. In order to begin healing of memory work it is essential that you are able to calm this response with slowing your breathing and grounding yourself in the present.  Review the grounding tools in the “tool kit” section.

Also, it is common that emotions of deep shame may be activated and experienced as a reaction in processing painful memories.  Why?  Because the powerlessness experienced in trauma is can be seen as “weakness” in the heart of the victim.  Also, the person, especially a child, will come to believe that the event happened because there was something wrong within them, rather than something wrong happening to them.

It is important that you begin this work from a position of SAFETY.  It is important that you intentionally focus on the fact that you are “VIEWING” this memory and NOT “RELIVING” THIS MEMORY.

It is also important that you “view” this memory with compassion and empathy for YOU in the midst of that situation.  Working with a professional therapist may be important because of this, or at least a friend.  And to be sure, prayerfully and intentionally inviting Jesus TO BE WITH YOU is your SAFEST PLACE TO BE!

Allow yourself to envision His presence in your heart’s eye.  We often pray: “Open the eyes of my heart Lord, I want to SEE YOU.”  Be in that “place” of safety throughout the work of processing this memory.
If you begin to experience distress, follow the guideline for PAUSE presented in the education in week 3.  Your focus and your intention is to process the memory correctly, so give language to your feelings and thoughts. 

Also, intentionally seek new understandings and perspectives that you were not able to consider in the midst of your neurological reactions during the event.  As you choose to agree with this NEW view of this event through the eyes of Jesus, and allow it to calm you, this memory will become “stored” in your memory “archives” in a completely new way!  This memory will be on its way from the emotional brain to long term memory.  You will be able to tell your story but not be over-reactive and/or devastated.  You have received comfort!


We are suggesting that you use the “Pause, Reflect, Receive” model as described below.
 
PAUSE … The ability to walk through this memory with Jesus moving toward hope, rather then re-living it with pain!

Cry out to Jesus as a person so that you can be quieted in His love.  In this quiet place with Jesus, you can share the story of your memory from the safe place of being with Jesus.  Ask Jesus to bring to your awareness the specific memory that is to be comforted and re-written.
 
Imagine this memory as a “video” that you are viewing, only instead of the pain and anguish you are used to, you are now watching it through the compassionate “eyes” of Jesus, Who gives to you understanding and comfort.  
Some people actually “sense” His presence in the memory as well, perhaps standing, sitting, talking!  As you and Jesus talk, express every upsetting emotion you had when you used to think about this memory, and be sure to note your new emotions as you hear His soothing voice now.

An important note: Sometimes Jesus will take you “frame by frame”, minute by minute through this memory-video, rather than rush through the entire memory all at one time.  Together, you and He will sense when to wait in part of the memory, and when to move on in the memory. 
 
REFLECT … The ability to hear clearly, and sense clearly, His heart, words and actions.

Ask Jesus the questions about this memory that you have been wanting to ask, perhaps for a long time!  And then be sure to listen to Him as He speaks with you.  Hear Him also as He speaks to other people in that memory.  In addition to speaking, what might Jesus actually do in that memory?  Look for action as well as words.  Do not rush through this reflection process. Allow time for the “video” to be “edited”.

How does His presence in this memory change your feelings about yourself and those involved, as well as the nature of God Himself?

How is His heart for you and those involved in this memory different from what you felt or came to believe?
 
RECEIVE … The ability to let His truth about this memory sink deeply into your heart and spirit by choosing to agree with, and thank Him, for what He has revealed to you.

What is the truth of this event through the heart and eyes of Jesus?

What is the lie that the world and the enemy would want you accept as truth?

How does this realization change your thoughts, feelings, beliefs and behavior in your current life?
 
Now that you have paused and reflected on everything above, answer these…  

I have come to believe…
I have gained…
I am set free to feel…
and set free to act…


Invite Jesus to be present in some particular memory that is hurtful even now, and hurtful when the event actually happened in the past…

What does he say to each person in the memory? 

What does He do to each person in the memory?

How does He make a positive experience out of a negative experience for everyone involved?

When He works in our memories, this is when we are invited to a new belief system, and realize that "feelings" can come and go and change sometimes rapidly!  The Healing begins as we begin to depend more on BELIEFS than on FEELINGS!!! 


Listen to Him as He comforts feelings and begins to re-write the deeper truth in their place!!!

* Most importantly, what is the truth of this event through the heart and eyes of Jesus?

* How does His presence in these memories begin to change your feelings and especially beliefs about yourself and those involved?  

* How is His heart for you and those involved in this memory different from what you felt or came to believe?

* Regarding your memories about your past, what is the lie that the world and the enemy would want you accept as truth?

* On a personal note, hearing and seeing His perspective about this painful memory, how does that make you feel and believe about God's deep, personal care for you?


To help you even better see the real truth (e.g. who did what and why) of this event through the heart and eyes of Jesus, take a moment to answer the following...


I am coming to believe the following truths (e.g., I am a child of God, I am of great worth to Him, I am loved, I am forgiven, I am safe, I am not alone...)

I am becoming aware that my losses are being transformed to my following gains (e.g., a new hope, a closer relationship with Jesus, deeper empathy for myself and others, and freedom from: fear, bitterness and hopelessness...) 

Because I am changing my beliefs about past experiences, I am being set free to feel (e.g., hope, joy, peace, the presence of love...)

Because I can begin to rely on beliefs based on God's truth rather than my own changeable feelings, I am choosing the following healthy behaviors (e.g., to be able to give and receive love, able to self-care, able to set proper boundaries...)


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PROMISES ..... short Scriptures to build you up and give you hope!

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”   (Matthew 11, NIV)

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