WEEKS 3 & 4 “TELLING MY STORY: I FELT"
STAGE OF CHANGE … Openness to change and preparing for change
STAGE OF GRIEF … Anger to Bargaining
EDUCATIONAL MATERIAL: “Wonderfully Made (Part 2) Introduction and We Are Designed for Protection and Survival.” This is found at the tab at the top of this page. Part 2 will be woven into the study in Weeks 3 & 4. Also, due to its importance, it can also be found at the end of Week 4.
Focus and Goals for Week 3 and 4: “Telling my story, I Felt”
Week 3 and 4: Group members are encouraged to begin telling their story through using the following narrative sentence: I felt, I lost, I came to believe, and I acted. Week 3 begins with “I felt”. In beginning this process the focus and goal will be to emphasize the difference between crying out to the person of Jesus whom you trust, rather than just crying out in pain. The emphasis in week 4 is to be able to “Tell your story” without re-living the feelings. This is accomplished by intentionally bringing language to the feelings.
In Week 4: The background educational work “Wonderfully Made/Scripture and Science: Introduction and “We Are Designed for Protections and Survival” (Part 2) will validate and facilitate understanding how He has designed us to receive comfort and healing as the Holy Spirit moves through seemingly very natural but actually, supernatural interventions in our lives. Be sure to read the “Bridge” page at the very beginning of Week 3!
KNOWING JESUS:
Week 3: “Knowing Jesus or Knowing about Him” Note the previous reference for Bowman Art. Look for the artwork entitled: “Mary”. Can you see the joy in her face?
Week 4: “Emmanuel”: This is actually an invitation to be open to change and preparing for change. Members may be struggling with seeing Jesus as a loving friend. Members might grapple with a question such as “How can I be more open to His love? Often, in the bargaining stage of grief, looking to the “self” or other forms of control (like addictions) to avoid hurtful feeling have become tried and true coping mechanisms.
KNOWING OURSELVES:
Week 3: This week begins the process of “Telling my Story”, beginning with “I Felt”. Processing the elements of the story can be identified here and repeated over the course of the next weeks. Allow for time and prayer so that a member can find just the right words or word pictures that clearly communicate the feelings connected to these memories. You may also ask what is happening in their bodies. These body responses are actually the deep biochemical responses activated by these thoughts and feelings.
It is also the time to invite them to become aware of the pain. And rather than ignore the pain or desperately continue in denial, acknowledge it, give it “voice” by giving it language and then begin to cry out to the person of Jesus. In fact, this may be a time to stop and pray for each person to decide to ask Jesus to bring His perspective to their hearts. This allows the healing to begin as they experience really being heard and seeing themselves more clearly. In sharing verbally, they can begin to experience that they are SEEN and understood by others.
Week 4: Seeing Our Losses Clearly/Extended Scale” This extended scale gives new words and language to the experience of loss of a core need. This worksheet also identifies the ages associated with the loss. This will assist in identifying the memories associated with the loss. Encourage the members to make a note in their “memory logs”.
The “Pause and Reflect” section of this worksheet is important; it will be used in later sessions. Help members watch for the reoccurring of negative thought patterns; these are so important because when someone is “stuck” in negativity, no choices seem viable to that person. Hence no freedom! Our goal is to help members be able to choose to move from agreeing with those negative thoughts to disagreeing with them, and instead accepting the thoughts of Jesus towards them.
Click HERE to go to Weeks 5 & 6
Click HERE to return to the Facilitator's Guide Introduction page